Some days when I want to write something and save it for later I will email myself. Last night I was going through my email folders, because yes, my email is pretty organized. My house could be a mess if you walked in, but not my email. I have folders that are all labeled. I have one marked writing and another free writing but I had forgotten about the one marked personal.
I am trying so hard to keep a positive attitude in the New Year. I was doing great the first couple of weeks. It seems like as soon as I stopped waking up early to have my moments of gratitude and mornings full of thanks, things started to change. I am trying so hard to not be negative, but I will tell, you it’s difficult to get out of this funk. It’s like once you start, how do you get back? I need a clean slate. A fresh start again.
Work has been good, but now the receptionist is going out for at least a month. We have a temp to cover, but basically she is late, like hours late, every morning, and that’s if she shows up. So who has to cover the phones? Me. Well, I share the duty with two of my co workers. I usually cover the phones at lunch break as well. It’s not that I can’t do it. I just get in my “it’s not fair” mode. Ugh. Pity party! I need to get over myself and snap out of this mood! I need to give thanks that I have a job. I need to realize my life is pretty damn good! I hate being a Debby Downer.
This past weekend I watched the movie Human: Volume 1. If I stop and think about some of the people that I saw in this movie, I can shut myself up. It is a documentary of sorts that I was turned on to by Tunisia Joyln. (check out her blog here) It is basically a series of interviews with all different people from all around the world answering all different questions.
This morning, as I sit here, trying to check myself before I wreck myself, one woman stands out in my mind. She says the most important thing she does is look at bottles. She looks at bottles all day, sometimes for 12 hours a day. She then goes on to say that she is exhausted. Who am I to complain? I have my own apartment, heat, running water, a car to drive, I sit at a computer all day. I am not walking or standing all day. I am not in the cold or snow, or even in the heat of a factory or field. No, I have it pretty good. Who am I to sit here and complain that I have to pick up the phone? There is another man who talks about lifting tires and how heavy they are. How his back aches from laboring all day. I don’t have to life much at all. Maybe a finger?
The more I think about this movie, these people, I am humbled. I realize how good my life really is. I can sit here and find plenty of things to complain about, or I can sit here and realize how blessed I really am. I have a beautiful, loving family, (one man talks about losing his brothers and sisters because of health, not having food), I have plenty of food and water. I have my health. I have NOTHING to complain about. NOTHING!
So that being said, I think I have reminded myself how much I really have. How I really need to appreciate everything. You can find the positive and the negative in every situation. I encourage people to watch this movie. There are 3 volumes and I have only seen the first so far. It is a good reminder of the things that really matter in life. To be thankful for what we have. To remind us how to turn a negative into a positive.
Photo Credit: I do not own the rights to this photo it was found on the internet